THE SHECKLER SYNDROME

so yesterday over at revolution skateshop in cotati we had ANDREW RENYOLDS, FIGGY, and COLIN PROVOST for an in store signing. so there was tons of bodies everywhere and word got out around town that there was a pro skater at the shop. now this is where things go really backwords, girls start comin up to the door that i was working and goin is ryan sheckler here? at first i thought nothing of it but more and more girls kept showin up askin for the sheck's. but everytime i told em' it was andrew renyolds they seemed disappointed. so by the time it was over they split and i went home to grab a pizza. so at the pizza place i just told the story to the broad that works there and shae tells me how here daughters love the sheckler. so she asks me what i think about the guy. and if you know me i have no problem voicing my opinion. so i tell here that i am NOT on board with this guys styles. so she fire back at me and calls me a hater. i pause for a moment and tell her you are right. i am a hater. and she proceeds to tell me that i am jealous of the money and the cars and the tv show.
but i told her that i wasn't hatin on that. and she looked confused. "then what could you possibly hate on?" she said. and this was the best cuz, all these people see is what is shown to them on televsion, they have no clue about how skateboarding really works. so i tell her that if someone wanted to make THE LIFE OF CHALKER a tv show then i would do it. not for the fame but to buy a house and put my in my kids future. and we all know if i was a millionare i would still drive my red truck and dress like a complete scumbag. and she wasn't buyin it. so finally i reach the point to tell her why i am a full blown hater.
-----------i let it be known that sheckler is a full blown ripper and when i see his part in the new plan b video i am sure i will be gnarly.
-----------i also wish i had his backlips on hand rails.
----------- but the real reason why i am not on the bandwagon is because of the crap like the photo above that my daughter has in her little magazines. i don't see a skater just another guy tryin to worm his way in my daughters life. and let it be known i am not lookin foward to my kid liking boys cuz i will be fully hatin on that shit. so now ryan has become the enemy.
----------- he also cried when he lost the 3rd leg of the dew cup. come on be a man.
-----------he cries about not be able to have a girlfriend........you a pro skater, bang different hoes in area codes.
------------ the proactive commercial for zit medicine.........for real? as i stated before, i you skate good chicks will flock to you like a 50% off sale at tiffany's.
so there it is in a nut shell. so girls pull your heads out and realize that there is more to skateboarding than the ex-gaymes, the douche cup, and mtv reality shows. if you wanna date a skater just get a 12 pack of pabst and head to your local skatepark. shit if you don't believe me just ask my wife.