SANTA DOES EXIST

so i get off work at 2:30 and head straight home to pick up my kid at the neighbors. and so i decide to whip out the blower and get rid of the leaves and pine needles in front of the path to my door. so i need the electrical cord to run the blower. and by this point my lawnmower is electric too. so i say "fuck it" and start mowin my lawn. after i couple of minutes for what ever reason i glance in the back of my pick-up. low and behold it was a 12-pack of pbr genuine draft. i shit you not i do not know how it got there. and to make it even crazier, that shit was cold.

THE KOOK NETWORK CHANNEL.

so the other day i was doin somethin and the t.v. was on and i heard some guy sayin. mega ramp is out and big air ramp is in. i almost threw my beer at the screen! what the fuck does this kook know? he has probably never dropped in on a vert ramp. fuck i remember when you didn't need an elevator to get to the top of a ramp. and now it's all about how far you can huck your carcass. don't get me wrong when i saw danny way do that shit back in the first D.C. video i was blown away. but leave it to espn to take somethin so gnarly, and capatalize off of it and make it the norm. so know every soccer mom and dad think that is what skateboarding is. so now what? most fools ain't gonna do that shit. so you better learn quick or your energy beverage house payment is gonna bounce. or better yet get wrecked on that shit, while on tv and be known forever as that guy that bailed from 2 stories up, and they will for get about the fact you fukken rip. but you will always be known as that guy. skating vert is gnarly enough, but i guess espn's capitalism will only die along with the guy that claims his life from this shit. ******(i do not wish for anyone to get hurt on that shit, but what will it take for skateboarders to take thier shit back.) and if you wanna see what a real ramp contest is like: youtube or google THE RUMBLE IN RAMONA.

HOLIDAY TRADITIONS.

it seems like every christmas i have two traditions that i have to do in order for me to feel like it is christmas. and i know for all my friends they have one or two that they have the need for as well. i am hopin that one day when i am dead and gone my kids will keep it goin. cuz, i never had a tradition till' i was about 22, and made it for myself. so i hope that this will make you wanna make your own lame ass one like myself.
----first i gotta watch A CHRISTMAS STORY. and if you have never seen that shit, then i suggest goin on to netflix and renting it.
----the second is i gotta listen to the VENTURES CHRISTMAS. the ventures are a old surf band that ruled. and i have a old cassette that just makes it even better.
----so turn up the volume on the video so you can hear the popping and crackling of the record to put you in the christmas spirit.

3...2...1....LAUNCH

so i saw this clip on shred or die and thought about when in the 80's nothing mattered but hangin out with your buddies and skating. and then the new thrasher showed up with a little throw back article by sal barbier and it made me think. skateboarding was nothing like it was today. there were no mega ramps or skateparks.the kids of today have got it easier. you can go anywhere to buy a board. almost every town has a skatepark. i know this is gonna make me sound like an old guy. but when i was a teen we had to build our own shit outta what ever we had. so if you got lucky, you had enough wood to make a launch ramp so you could do vert tricks without having a vert ramp. i tried to get a bunch of people to send me photos but this is what i got. and now you now why all the skaters from the 80's got bad knees and backs. this is also where the term "fatty to flatty" originated from.


-crellin-judo air



-chon travis-saran wrap



-matt wilson-method



-chalker-backside airwalk



-chalker-fridgid



-meta-japan air



take a look back into the time machine.

SKATER OF THE YEAR PARTY.

silas won skater of the year, and if you havent seen any footy of him just youtube the shit. he has the most laid back style. and one of the most humble guys i know. mix that with being a total ripper. and now you know why he won. there were many people in attendance, by the likes of, gravette, horn, wade speyer made it out. dennis buesnitz and his ol' lady julia. i think i saw jeff kendall, eric gonzales, ramondetta, gerwer, manderson, and even jim thiebaoud, and i cannot forget mick-e. i wanna thank silas for hookin me and my ol'lady up with a date night. and i wanna thank tony and ash, for letting me and kelly for crashin on the couch. and brian for drivin our behinds over there when the party was done.

-GET CHO' NAME OUT THERE


-PHELPS GAVE THE APPROVAL


-PARENTS NIGHT OUT. THE CHALKER'S AND TRUJILLO'S



-JOSH TWO FISTIN


-THEY EVEN HAD A PHOTO BOOTH


-TOO SHORT.........BEEEEOOOOOTCH!



-WE FINISHED OFF THE NIGHT AT THIS SHIT HOLE


-THE LEGENDARY JOSH SOUTH WAS THERE


-CHALKER FOUND A NEW DRINKING BUDDY


-KEHOE SOTY IN 2009?


-SILAS AND CHALKER...ONE....TWO...MANY


-DAS BAXTER-NEALS


-JOSH WAS HAPPY FOR SILAS


-UNTIL NEXT YEAR.

MISTAKEN IDENTITY

according to phelps i look like this guy. you be the judge.

-tom knox.


-chalker.

THIS ENTRY HAD ANOTHER TITLE BUT KNOW IT IS CALLED"FUCK MYSPACE"

i usually make these little commercials for myspace to get readers over here to check out what the chronicles are all about. but they suspended my video use, for copyright infringement for this song from the movie crybaby. so know i am gonna throw some sucky bass line i just made up and try to repost it. well at least you get the real feel here from the chronicles. and there is what i originally posted below, before i got pissed.
-----------so what are you supposed to do with all those jpegs you save to your hard drive? half the time they just sit there. and since i havent got any footy on the dad cam in a while. i decided to make another commercial outta this stuff takin up my hard drive.

THE SKATE WITCHES.

holy shit....... i almost forgot about these broads.

IF YOU CAN'T SEE IT, DOES IT EXIST?

many beers have lost thier lives here. the triangle was nothin to fuck with. i had this idea of takin some shitty photos and sending it to a mag for a article. well heres the article. if you want it make it happen. this shit cost about 37 dollars total. we spent more on beers than for the ramp. go dumpster divin to find your wood in recycle bins of different companies, and bring to an area and let your mind do the rest. the triangle was proof that you don't some beverage company to pay for your shit. and know you have seen what can be done. i wanna see some other shit out there. no more excuses why it can't be done. and to all the sailors that got lost in the triangle this tall is for you. but wait a minute..... where did it go?




Chalker Ramp Session 12.2008

MySkate | Myspace Video

SKATEPARK.COM-THE BEERMUDA TRIANGLE.

the secret is out.
click on the posted by chalker below and it will send you straight to the skatepark website.

DANZIG'S NEW VIDEO.

i saw this and laughed my ass off. the danzig-shakira mash up. you will not be dissapointed.

SILAS WINS THRASHER MAG'S SKATER OF THE YEAR.

silas won thrasher magazines, skater of the year. good job brotha. just for that next time i see you talls of pbr on me. anyways i brought out this clip of the beer-muda triangle. yeah i know we have seen it before, but at the time who knew?

the chalker chronicles

WALKER, TEXAS SKATER,

this week i have been workin 12 hour days so my brain is fried. so i stole a photo from brians archive, an added a trick of tony walker that i filmed. and here you go. now i am gonna go to bed. so i will have some sanity left, so i can skate tomorrow.

tony walker

BARNEYS ON PARADE.

Aren't you too old to Skateboard?


well louis had some footy on his hard drive and made a video. and i was dry on ideas today. so i gotta thank loudog for makin this to take up some space. and by the way support your local barneys cuz you always need to respect the old people.

SCUMDIES(c)

i found this drawing i emailed to someone a while back. this has been my idea for quite sometime. boxers made for skaters that take road trips with out all the benefits of showers or washing machines. basically we all know you shit gets fukked up by farting or drinking to much and wizzing on yourself. so here it is. chalkers copyrighted "SCUMDIE". so if any of you know where i can make my dream a reality leave me a comment with an email address.

ORCAS ISLAND.

----this one is self explanatory. orcas island. this little kid killed it and well there was some wildlife.

YOU JUST GOT DELETED.

so anyways i got no clue why this shit got deleted on myspace. they e-mailed me and said it was a questionable image. whatever. so people have been wanting to see it so here it is. we were on a trip and stoppped at this place where retail stores can get racks and shit for displayin stuff. well if you go in the back they have the best full size human replicas. so brian took this photo as well as many others. hopefully those will be available. on the fridgers site.
WWW.FRIDGERZ.COM

WHERE HAVE THE BOYS OF SUMMER GONE?

i was gonna have one final blow-out at the beer-muda triangle, but it seems that mother nature had other plans. tonight we have to roll the clock back. fukk where did the summer go? i have tarped it up hopin that we can get one more run outta it. but i know one thing for sure, summer is officially over.